OT need professional opinions

I've kind of had the holiday blues the last few days so I interest to make sure I'm not just being overly emotional.

My last relationship I was a little over 2 yrs with a couple months break about a yr in. section of the reason things ended was because I just never felt like I was much of a priority to him. Obviously his kids were number 1 but I felt like 2 yrs in I are worthy of been at least close to equal priority. But I wasn't. He would drop plans with me without second thought if it meant being in reference to his kids. He hasn't been an eowe dad. He saw his kids all the time except the weekends his exw had them. But if exw asked him to take them on her weekend he would no hassle even if we already had big plans together. I also felt like we weren't blending our the entire family at all. It was quite a bit his kids and my kids. I think if no kids had been involved we will have been great together but it is what it is. We broke up on good terms and are still friends.

after a few months, something like 6 months ago I met a new guy. He's been quite, We have tons in common, Have fun every, He met my kids about a month ago and is great with them. He was supposed to come to my family's house for thanksgiving. The night before his sm fell and hit her head. He met her at the hospital and she was ok but he chose to stay with her for the day to watch her and make sure she was ok. I was dissapointed but grasped. So about a month ago I asked him if he wanted to go with me to the xmas play at my church which I needed to get advance tickets for. He made the comment that star wars comes out that night but yes he would come with me and see the movie on saturday. So I buy the flight tickets. the other day he texted me and said his kids (18 yr old twins who I've yet to meet as they have no a fixation with meeting me) Called him and would like to go to the movie tonight. So he's taking them and spitting out me off. definitely, About a week ago he informed me that when his kids graduate in may they and their mom are considering moving several states away. If they do he is intending follow them as he has nothing keeping him here. I get it they're his kids and he wants to be near them but it still hurt my feelings to know I wasn't even a consideration. I'm just not sure this is worth pursuing with the risk of it ending abruptly in 6 months and knowing that I'm simply not a priority to him. What do you consider? Am I in order to be upset about tonight and him blowing me off? Would you be hurt ought to me? Am I expecting a baby too much out of men with kids? Or is there something wrong with me that tells men I don't ever need to be a priority? I'm seriously about to write off men generally so please tell me if I'm wrong. Sorry so long, Just very annoyed right now.

So I'm saying this with kindness and honesty but I would run from a man harvest put his kids first. Even adult teenagers. My BF knows my children come first. He has zero trouble with it. we have been together 3 years. I would totally drop my BF to go to a movie if my teenage/adult children asked me because time with a child that age is precious and transient and my BF would understand without a shadow of a doubt. I would also move to be with my children and if that meant the end to my spouse, Then it might have been what it was. I think that part of being single with children is knowing that dating parents will be nothing beats dating as childless singles years ago. accountabilities have changed and commitment to their children comes first.

From what was say about his actions, I think you know response.

and no, It's not asking very much from men with kids. I married a man with a child and if something popped up where he had his son at the final, in which we had plans in place, He'd pay for it for his parents or other family member to watch DSS (sweetie stepson) Until we were done. Not solitary time, But many times. He was/is an extraordinary dad, But he knows that our alliance came/comes high on his priority list as well. (we have been together for 9 years, betrothed for 5.)

I guess I just desire, If he previously called and said his dd (Dear little) Had appendicitis and was at a healthcare facility, Of course I would master, A movie which is going to be there tomorrow I don't. Is it never acceptable for a parent to tell their kids sorry I produce other plans? Am I not allowed to ever be important?

I've considered that it might be easier to date men with no kids but concurrently,just the same I'm not sure I have the right to be picky considering I do have kids. And at my age I think I'd be challenged if we have to find a guy girls in colombia never married and no kids. And if I did find him I'd probably wonder main points wrong with him.

Just discouraged. Maybe I just should accept that I'm not intended to be with anyone.

I think if it was any other movie it would not be a thing but this movie is a huge deal to some people and going on opening night is an event. It's assessing apples and oranges to going to see some stupid Adam Sandler movie you know?

My guy was 32 whenever i met him, Had never been to you're wedding, And we had not had kids. He had dated but just had never found any person. He went from no kids to four kids and they phone him constantly Dad and he is, In all sense of the word, Their biological father. He had to learn great deal and he had some single guy traits that he had to tweak (not unlike I had to tweak some single mom traits!) But I couldn't have asked for a better location. Not having to organize who has kids when and regular exercise bedroom situations and helping kids cope with step siblings was a huge payoff.

I've been doing online dating sites lately and you would be shocked at how many men there are in their 40's (I'm with my mid 40's) who don't have kids. it appears as if at least 25% according to their profiles.

I've been trying to puzzle out if my best match is (theoretically) A guy with kids still back home, Grown and out by themself, Or no teenagers. All have positives and negatives. working a family (Even in a longer term dating situation) With kids on both sides seems so hard as you have been describing.

To add to some PP's, OP (genuine poster) I think we both know that parents should put their kids first. But does that mean they have to completely drop everything anytime something comes up? individuals may think so, Others not really.

It appears like you both have different opinions on that matter. you want to decide if that's something you can tolerate or not. Just another reason why dating a person with children is not for the inexperienced. It takes a LOT of patience and lose. But it's worthwhile to decide what you're willing to put up with, And what you are not.

I think blending besides adult children is hard. It is hard to figure out holidays and family events with one set of kids and two seperate parent households (Heck even with set of parents who never seperated! It's difficult to acquire days that work to all get together due to in laws). Double by purchasing two sets of kids and four sets of parents.

I do think that often times there are wonderful wonderful outcomes to blended families. Some realize success amazingly and step siblings can be a gigantic blessing to their step parents and the other kids. For my given situation, I knew my kids were struggling enough making use of their absent dad that it would add only more stress (Plus I currently had 4 kids! associate and i were didn't want anymore!)

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